Where does time go?

I haven’t written a blog post since 2nd July, and it only feels like yesterday, SO much has happened!

Let’s do a quick recap –

June – injured, ruptured bakers cyst and torn meniscus in same knee, no running, lots of visits to the physio.

July running buddy breaks foot, I get the all clear to run again, managed 1 test run!! got sent into self-isolation for 10 days, because a colleague decided to get covid.

August, celebrated many birthdays, also went on Holiday.

September watched my son get married, beautiful wedding, beautiful setting, beautiful bride.

This weekend coming – Great Newcastle (Not the GNR) half marathon. Amount of running done since June, nowhere near e-fucking-nough!! Although, according to Strava, I ran 16 times during August for a total of approximately 18 hours and covered 63.2 miles.

My original plan for GNR was to try and run the whole way and not feel like miles 7-13 were a fight for life, my goal was to try and do it in less than 3 hours 30 minutes. My current plan is to run/walk while i can, walk/walk if i must, not kill Annette, and try and be home again before midnight.

Everything is different this year (obviously; bloody covid is still around) different route, new fucking hills, rolling wave starts (don’t even get me started on the start times).

I have managed to book a hotel near the start line, which this year is also near the finish line, pretty much the only decent thing about this run so far. It’s ridiculously expensive, I really don’t understand why hotels put their prices up so high but suffice it to say, hotel prices this weekend are more than double next weekends and subsequent weekend prices for the same fucking room. Its a piss take, not helped by the fact that prices are already over inflated because hotels are trying to claw back the money they lost while they had to close for covid, even though the government have offered safety net payments to staff and tax relief for businesses (in most cases) which we as customers will no doubt be paying back in inflated taxes for the next billion and 3 years.

(And breath)

Anyway, my bag is packed and I am ready to go, car is fuelled, address is in the navigation system (and my phone, just in case) people know what time they need to be at my house or ready. All is good….. except, pre-run nerves have arrived a day early. I over think things at the best of times and am currently over thinking my over thinking.

My current concern (for this hour) is what time do we head off for the start?

My wave start time is 13:15PM !! yes, that’s right, quarter past fucking dinner time. Who in their right mind thinks its a good idea to start the slow people who will take 3:30-4 hours to run a half marathon at dinner time???

We have to be at the arrival point at 12:25 so quite what they are doing with us in the 35 minutes before the “10” minute walk to the start line I am not sure, but somewhere in there I guess I need to consider a pee, a poop or both, just to make it look like I’m a real runner.

Perhaps a later breakfast and a snack while we are at the assembly point or on the way to the assembly point, will my planned route from hotel to assembly point actually be accessible? Followed by a bit of a picnic at miles 4, 8 and 12 ?

I was seriously considering doing the race village before the run because it will be too late by the time we have finished, but I don’t want to walk miles and then have to run for fucking miles too and I don’t think i will get away with “wait here while I put this stuff in the car” and then I will just not come back!

Its going to be tea time before I am done, then there’s the compulsory 30 minutes of dying, crying and “never again” selfies before I try to hobble back to the car. Once in the car, I will need a McDonalds thick shake ( because nothing else stops me wanting to throw up after a long run) but of course, McDonalds haven’t had thick shakes for about 6 weeks because of the national shortage of drivers / brexit / covid / faulty machines (Agggh) and then a lovely 4 ish hour drive back home. I say “ish” because I will definitely need a wee, and depending on how much I have seized up in the car depends how long it will take me to creak and waddle my way to the loo and back at the service station, where I will also no doubt want to buy and eat “All” the food.

This is definitely my last year doing this run, in fact it’s my last ever half marathon (she says) I really don’t enjoy them that much, although I get a great sense of satisfaction when I tell people I’m doing it, and they have “that” look on their face!